Lightning Fill In The Blank

Nov 4, 2017
Originally published on November 4, 2017 11:07 am
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PETER SAGAL, HOST:

Now it is time for our final game, Lightning Fill In The Blank. Each of our players will have 60 seconds in which to answer as many fill-in-the-blank questions as they can. Each correct answer now worth two points. Bill, can you give us the scores?

BILL KURTIS: Faith and Helen each have three. Alonzo has two.

SAGAL: All right. Alonzo, that means you're in third place. You're up first. The clock will start when I begin. Your first question - fill in the blank.

On Wednesday, Sayfullo Saipov was charged with terrorism for his attack on a bike path in blank.

ALONZO BODDEN: New York.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: On Monday, a federal judge partially blocked President Trump's ban on blanks in the military.

BODDEN: Transgender people.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: This week, Spanish authorities charged 20 leaders from blank with rebellion and sedition.

BODDEN: Oh, Catalonia?

SAGAL: Right, Catalonia.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: A billionaire heiress arrested for public intoxication in London was cleared after telling the court blank.

BODDEN: My name is Hilton?

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: No, she said, quote, "I wasn't drunk. I just have a funny walk."

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: This week, an Egyptian research team detected a large void hidden in the blank.

BODDEN: Pyramid?

SAGAL: Yes. Great Pyramid.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: On Tuesday, Apple fired one of their engineers after his daughter posted a video showcasing the not-yet-released blank.

BODDEN: New iPhone.

SAGAL: Right, iPhone 10.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: A comment on The New York Times website went viral this week...

(SOUNDBITE OF GONG)

SAGAL: ...After it was posted by a woman who blanked.

BODDEN: Faked it?

SAGAL: No.

HELEN HONG: (Laughter).

SAGAL: No. She forgot to turn off talk-to-text when she was interrupted by a friend. So the comment posted on The New York Times website goes, quote, "zero optimism that the Democrats can ever regain - hello?

Hi. Oh, you're there. Are you outside? Oh, well, let me come to your door. I'm icing my knee, and I'm hard boiling some eggs. Let me get up because I'm right now sort of trapped in my chair. And then I'll put the ice pack back on when you get here. OK, thanks. Bye-bye."

(LAUGHTER)

HONG: That...

BODDEN: Judging by the length of that text, she's lying.

SAGAL: Yeah.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Bill, how did Alonzo do on our quiz?

KURTIS: He got five right, ten more points, total of 12. And Alonzo moves into the lead.

SAGAL: All right.

(APPLAUSE)

SAGAL: Well, we flipped a coin. Helen has elected to go second. So, Helen, fill in the blank. This week, chief of staff John Kelly faced a backlash after saying a failure to compromise led to blank.

HONG: The Civil War.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: On Tuesday, former DNC chair Donna Brazile said blank's campaign had an unethical relationship with the committee.

HONG: Hillary Clinton.

SAGAL: Yes.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: On Friday, President Trump began his 12-day trip to blank.

HONG: China.

SAGAL: No - oh, yeah.

I'll give it to - Asia.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: An article about students getting work experience published by a paper in Kansas got national headline this week thanks to the headline, students get firsthand blank.

(LAUGHTER)

HONG: Jobs.

SAGAL: Experience.

(LAUGHTER)

HONG: Oh.

SAGAL: Yes.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: Students get firsthand job experience.

HONG: Yes.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: This week, President Obama confirmed that he planned to show up for blank later this month.

HONG: Jury duty.

SAGAL: Yes.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: For the first time in 20 years, blank announced they were releasing a new chocolate bar.

HONG: Hershey's?

SAGAL: Yes.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: Thanks to a new limited edition bath bomb...

(SOUNDBITE OF GONG)

SAGAL: ...Bathers can now leave their tub smelling like blank.

HONG: Is it dogs?

SAGAL: No, it's fried chicken.

HONG: Aww.

(LAUGHTER)

HONG: Gross.

SAGAL: The bath bomb, which is shaped like a chicken drumstick, is being sold by KFC, of course.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: They'll promise it'll make your bathwater smell exactly like their secret blend of 11 herbs and spices.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: They also say it'll leave your skin feeling silky smooth, unless you get in the bath before it cools down enough, at which point you'll be coming out extra crispy.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Bill, how did Helen do on our quiz?

KURTIS: Well, she got six right, 12 more points. She now has a total of 15. That leads this thing.

SAGAL: That was a strong round, Helen.

(APPLAUSE)

HONG: Yeah.

SAGAL: How many, then, does Faith need to win?

KURTIS: Seven to win.

SAGAL: Seven to win? Oh, my gosh. Faith, this is for the game. On Thursday, Sam Clovis, Trump's pick for the USDA's top scientist, resigned due to questions arising from the blank probe.

FAITH SALIE: Russia.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: After a demand from the governor, officials in blank scrapped a $300 million power grid contract with Whitefish Energy.

SALIE: Oh, Puerto Rico.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: On Thursday, President Trump named Jerome Powell to be the new chairman of the blank?

SALIE: Federal Reserve.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: On Thursday, Pennsylvania opened up applications for its new medical blank program.

SALIE: Marijuana?

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: This week, a writer for The St. Louis Post-Dispatch pointed out that some reporters were pronouncing Allahu Akbar in such a way that it meant blank.

SALIE: Oh, it meant, like, potatoes.

SAGAL: It meant potatoes are the greatest.

SALIE: Potatoes are the greatest, yeah.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

HONG: Wow.

(LAUGHTER)

SALIE: And who's to - I mean, I agree.

SAGAL: It's true. In response to allegations of misconduct by Kevin Spacey, Netflix announced it was halting production of blank.

SALIE: "House Of Cards."

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: On Tuesday, the owner of Papa John's Pizza blamed his company's poor sales on blank.

SALIE: The NFL protests.

SAGAL: That's right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: A new study finds that the door handles at Starbucks are blank.

(SOUNDBITE OF GONG)

SALIE: Oh. Probably just rife with germs.

SAGAL: That's right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: In fact, the way they put it was dirtier than a New York City subway pole.

(LAUGHTER)

SALIE: Oh.

HONG: Wow.

SAGAL: According to the study, door handles at your local Starbucks contain more germs per capita than pretty much any surface in New York subway system. Seems gross. But reserve judgment until you - after you've tried your Starbucks new ecolichino (ph).

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Bill, Faith did really well. Did she do well enough to win?

KURTIS: Faith got eight right for 16 more points - a total of 19. And Faith is this week's champion.

(APPLAUSE)

SAGAL: That's amazing.

KURTIS: A very high score. Transcript provided by NPR, Copyright NPR.