The bell tolls thrice! Will a visit from a Mystery Guest— or should we say, a Mystery Ghost of Quiz-mas Yet To Come— melt the heart of Puzzle Guru Ebenezer Scrooge? Jonathan Coulton and Scrooge ask yes or no questions to guess our Mystery Ghost's secret.
OPHIRA EISENBERG, HOST:
While Emma and Dylan get ready for our final round, it's time for us to play a game. This is Mystery Guest. Or should I say Mystery Ghost?
(SOUNDBITE OF CLOCK TOLL)
EISENBERG: That's right. It's time for the spirit of Quiz-mas yet to come. A stranger is about to join us onstage. Jonathan and Scrooge have no idea who this person is or what she does. Today, I only know the answer. Mystery ghost, please introduce yourself.
SONIA ORTIZ: My name is Sonia Ortiz, and I have an interesting job.
EISENBERG: All right, so Jonathan and Scrooge, you have to ask Sonia yes-or-no questions to try to figure out what her interesting job is.
WILL HINES: (As Ebenezer Scrooge) OK, I will begin. Does your job have to do with hating Christmas?
HINES: (As Ebenezer Scrooge) OK, I'm going to be at a disadvantage for this one.
JONATHAN COULTON: It's a good question. It narrows it down.
HINES: (As Ebenezer Scrooge) I made it easy for you.
COULTON: Yep, thank you. Do you have a job where you interface with customers, with the public?
HINES: (As Ebenezer Scrooge) Is your job charitable in nature? Is it involved, like, with a charity or giving - you know, good-guy stuff?
HINES: (As Ebenezer Scrooge) Good.
COULTON: Sonia, do you make something?
EISENBERG: Hmm. I'm going to say you would answer yes to that.
ORTIZ: Yeah, yes.
HINES: (As Ebenezer Scrooge) Is it a tangible product?
HINES: (As Ebenezer Scrooge, laughing) Do you, like - do you make ideas? Do you give - do you suggest ideas to people?
HINES: (As Ebenezer Scrooge) What?
COULTON: You could do that? You can have that kind of a job?
EISENBERG: Just a reminder that she is the ghost of the future, if that is all - at all helpful.
HINES: (As Ebenezer Scrooge) Oh, this is some online nonsense or digital silliness.
COULTON: You're way, way out of your element now, Scrooge.
HINES: (As Ebenezer Scrooge) OK, all right. Are you a tweet?
HINES: (As Ebenezer Scrooge) Are you, yourself, a tweet?
COULTON: That's not how it works. That's not how it works, Scrooge.
HINES: (As Ebenezer Scrooge) It's a yes-or-no question.
COULTON: Yeah, but...
HINES: (As Ebenezer Scrooge) Are you a tweet?
COULTON: Are you involved with futurism, with predicting things that are going to happen?
HINES: (As Ebenezer Scrooge) Oh, stars - you into, like, star maps?
HINES: (As Ebenezer Scrooge) But primarily - I mean, is that what we're...
ORTIZ: Yes, yes.
HINES: (As Ebenezer Scrooge) Astrologist? Are you an astrologist?
COULTON: Are - you're an astrologist.
ORTIZ: Yes, yes.
EISENBERG: Yes, that is correct.
ORTIZ: That's is correct.
EISENBERG: Sonia is a diviner whose horoscope columns appear in the women's magazines Bust and Got a Girl Crush.
HINES: (As Ebenezer Scrooge) Cool.
EISENBERG: All right. So Sonia, how did you get into divination?
ORTIZ: My mother is obsessed with horoscopes and has some experience it - with it herself. However, her very good friend taught me everything about tarot, astrology. I've been doing this now for, like, 25 years, but I studied with her for about five years.
EISENBERG: OK. So do you believe in it?
EISENBERG: OK. So do you think people should read their horoscope, and believe in them and take them at face value?
EISENBERG: What should they do with their horoscopes?
ORTIZ: It's a tool like with anything else. How can I put this without offending anyone in the astrological community?
ORTIZ: It's just a suggestion.
ORTIZ: It's a suggestion. You know, don't take it literal. It's - they're mostly fun. They're for fun, and they give good advice, but advice, you know, like with anyone, like a close friend giving you advice, you don't have to take it to the whole level. Like, you don't...
EISENBERG: So you should still incorporate it into your own life however that's meaningful.
EISENBERG: Is it ever scary?
ORTIZ: Sometimes, yes.
EISENBERG: And what do you do?
ORTIZ: I, you know, tell them because you should. You can't really hold anything back.
ORTIZ: But I also tell them that, you know, I think with the way I do astrology, too, I look into possible futures. And I'm like, well, the - everything your trajectory shows that this could very well happen, but you have the power to change it.
HINES: (As Ebenezer Scrooge) Ah, optimistic.
EISENBERG: Deep, Scrooge, isn't it? You have the power to change it.
HINES: (As Ebenezer Scrooge) Ooh. I feel good.
EISENBERG: Fantastic. Thank you so much for joining us. Everyone, give it up for our mystery guest, Sonia Ortiz.
(APPLAUSE) Transcript provided by NPR, Copyright NPR.